


The Three Answers

by bora_starlight



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Sad Oikawa Tooru, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:40:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28384161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bora_starlight/pseuds/bora_starlight
Summary: Iwaizumi finds Oikawa at the point of breaking down. Why can't he see himself the way Iwaizumi sees him?! He makes Oikawa answer three questions and makes himself clear about his feelings towards the setter.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 4
Kudos: 93





	The Three Answers

**Author's Note:**

> This didn't come out as planned but it's just a short oneshot about one of my most favourite ships, I need to practice~ 😆😌 Also, I'm really bad at summaries....... Hope you enjoy anyway 🥰
> 
> (English is not my first language, so if you find any mistakes, you can always correct me, I'll be grateful!)

_Where is he?_ thought Iwaizumi as he was standing in front of a restaurant. Oikawa was supposed to be there half an hour ago for their date. Yes, he was late from time to time, but definitely not more than ten minutes. Something was wrong. He wasn't even picking up the phone.

Iwaizumi decided to go to Oikawa's place. It wasn't too far from the restaurant, much closer than Iwaizumi's umiversity dorm. Oikawa had a very small apartment on his own since the end of the first year at the university. Of course, Iwaizumi had his own key. They've been dating since the last year of high school, almost three years now. And they've been together since forever anyway, Oikawa would still go out with him and give him a spare key of his apartment, even if they weren't dating.

They've been to many dates. They've gone through several ups and downs, but they've never left each other's side. Although they were studying at different universities, they still spoke almost daily. Tired and annoyed Iwaizumi would wake up to sweet morning messages and Oikawa would always get notified to eat instead of overworking himself. They needed each other in their lives and they knew it. They never wanted to change the way they were.

Iwaizumi locked his phone _again_ , ignored by his boyfriend. He didn't know whether to be angry or worried. He soon saw the street he knew so well and went up the stairs to Oikawa's place. He knocked at first. Without a respond. He knocked again, harder and longer this time, but he was ignored one more time. He fished the key out of his pocket and unlocked the aparment. It was dark and quiet. The first room was a kitchen with a living room. It looked untouched. The bathroom seemed empty as well.

Iwaizumi uneasily opened the door to the bedroom. He didn't know what to expect, how to act, Oikawa had never done this before. But what he saw was beyond what he could process quickly.

The room was almost completely dark, only lit by a tiny volleyball-lamp that Iwaizumi gave Oikawa as a Christmas present a year ago. The whole-body mirror would be lying on the ground along with a few books and magazines if Oikawa's sport bag didn't stop it and save it from the damage. Then there were clothes _everywhere_. On the ground, on the chair and the table, hanging from the wardrobe doors and the drawers and on the bed, where Iwaizumi finally saw his boyfriend. Oikawa was sitting in the corner of the room on his bed with perfectly white sheets and Iwaizumi could see his cheeks glittering with tears in the weak light. There were a few used tissues around the bed, too. He saw Oikawa's phone on the nightstand lightening up randomly as messages from his classmates and family kept coming, but Oikawa's brain blocked that stimulus a long time ago. He also didn't seem to notice the other man walking into his room.

"What the hell is going on?!" Iwaizumi said. It wasn't soft but it wasn't absolutely furious either. Oikawa just looked at the wall, away from the other man, not wanting his Iwa-chan to see him like that, but having no strength to actually do something about it.

After a minute of silence, which was broken only by Oikawa's silent sobs, Iwaizumi accepted he was not getting an answer and closed the door. He walked to his boyfriend, who tried to hide his face, but he didn't touch him or talk to him at all. To Oikawa's surprise, he took the blanket and put it around Oikawa's shoulders, so he'd stay warm. He tugged him in properly, not giving him a single look, even though Oikawa could see his expression clearly in front of him – he was worried out of his mind. Iwaizumi turned around and looked around the room. He started picking up and tidying up the clothes.

It took a long while, but he was done. He also threw out the tissues, put the books on their places and fixed the mirror. When the room was clean, he looked at Oikawa. He'd tried to give him some time to show him he didn't have to talk straightaway, but he needed to know what was wrong. He had to know!

He sat in front of his boyfriend and looked at his face. The tears had dried, the sobbing had stopped. But he still wouldn't look at Iwaizumi.

"Oikawa. What's wrong?" he started silently. Oikawa almost hissed. He really didn't want to say it out loud, especially in front of the person dearest to him; the person, who this all was about as well. Oikawa kept looking at his lap.

"I'm not mad I had to wait, just tell me," Iwaizumi lied to make him feel better.

"You _are_ mad," Oikawa knew him too well to get fooled. His voice was raspy. From the long silent crying, Iwaizumi thought. What he didn't know was that Oikawa'd also spent a few minutes by screaming all his ugly thoughts and feelings out while making his room a pure mess. He didn't know the reason of it all. He didn't know...

"Alright, I am mad," Iwaizumi agreed with a sigh, "but that's not important, is it? I really want to know what happened. Please, tell me. Please, look me in the eyes and tell me."

More silence. Internally, the setter was going crazy and Iwaizumi could feel it. He hated it so much.

"Tooru, look at me. Please," he begged more, getting really desperate and Oikawa could both hear it in his trembling voice and see it in his darkened eyes - if he was looking, of course, which he refused. What if Iwaizumi saw all his thoughts? What if he saw his real ugly self? He was almost sure his lover was able to see it all from a single look into his eyes. And he definitely didn't want that.

"Please, tell me why you were crying. Please. I can't leave it like this, I can't leave you... Please, Tooru! Look at me and tell me what is happening. Please, look at me," Iwaizumi's demanding voice changed into bare whispers. And Oikawa broke down again. How could he not after hearing Iwaizumi caring and begging so much? Tears were finding their way down the pale face, shining in the dim colorful light, mirroring in Iwaizumi's eyes like black shadows, unwanted, unwelcomed, yet accepted and respected. Oikawa couldn't make his feelings come out as words, his tears took over him fully.

Iwaizumi didn't seem suprirsed. He opened his arms and welcomed his boyfriend in a warm embrace. Oikawa put his forehead on Iwaizumi's chest and the raven-haired man hugged his shoulders, still covered by the blanket. It wasn't very comfortable, but it was loving.

"It's okay, I promise. I'm here now," Iwaizumi said into his boyfriend's ear, making Oikawa cry out loud. He had no idea what had happened, but he assumed Oikawa'd talk after calming down a little. They stayed like that for a moment, but Oikawa suddenly decided to speak. And Iwaizumi didn't expect to hate it so much.

"Let's break up."

"Excuse me, what?!" Iwaizumi exclaimed, grabbed Oikawa's arms and pushed him further away, burning his pretty face with his eyes.

"I'm sorry," Oikawa choked on his sobbs.

"What the hell, Tooru?! What is happening?"

"I'm trying. So hard, really. I just can't change it," cried the brunette.

"Explain," Iwaizumi basically ordered it.

"None of these clothes would do. They never do. I still look like shit. My personality is even worse, I always leave you waiting, I'm too spontaneous, too loud and energetic, too emotional, too needy, too dramatic, I'm _just too much_. Everyone hates so many things about me... I have no more confidence left, Hajime, no matter what I wear or say or act like. I'm not worth anything, I don't deserve anything, let alone love. Let alone _your_ love! I can't go out and make us both uncomfortable again. I can't," Oikawa spoke in between the sobbs. Iwaizumi was speachless, too shocked to react. Oikawa felt like _that?_ _His Tooru_ thought all those things? How did it even come to it?

"You can find a beautiful, kind, funny and smart boy or girl that would suit you so well and be happy. Please, don't be mad at me for this, just leave and forget you had to experience all of this. I don't want to exist like this anymore, Iwaizumi." Oikawa let out and his eyes were still fixed on the mattress. "Let's just end it, _please_."

Iwaizumi was punched back to reality by a single word. His grip tightened and growled: "Say that again!"

Oikawa blinked and gifted him a very confused look for a second. "L-let's just end it, please...?"

"No, not that. My name, Oikawa. What did you call me?!"

Oikawa realized. He went completely silent until his boyfriend didn't cup his face with both hands and speak up again: "Oikawa Tooru, look me in the eye and repeat it."

So Oikawa did. The chocolate eyes full of tears met the green ones full of rage. "Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi Hajime, that's your name."

"Say _my_ name, Oikawa. _Your_ name for me. _Our_ name," Iwaizumi was frowning more than usually. He was furious. Oikawa's silence made him even angrier.

"Say it," he whispered the last time before Oikawa's mouth opened and he mumbled something which sounded incoherently.

"Sorry? I can't hear you."

"Iwa-chan," said Oikawa louder and although it still only came out as a whisper, Iwaizumi already felt better, immediately after hearing the nickname. Listening to it from Oikawa's mouth felt like honey was being poured on his heart, wrapping around it, keeping it warm, sweet and tender. He hated the name when they were kids, but grew up to like it.

"Again, repeat it," he nodded, still holding Oikawa's face and looking straight into his beautiful eyes.

"Iwa-chan," he said louder this time.

"Yes. And one last time," supported him his boyfriend.

"Iwa-chan..." Oikawa couldn't control himself. He was crying so hard Iwaizumi could feel the wetness of his tears on his palms. He didn't care, though; it was hard to tell, whether he even noticed. He was caressing, hugging, kissing Oikawa solely with his eyes. And Oikawa felt it, despite his blurred vision. Neither of them broke the eye contact. They were in their own world, understanding each other, loving each other too deeply for the real world to comprehend.

"You just answered three questions, Tooru," explained Iwaizumi. Oikawa frowned.

"That name was the answer for three questions. Do you wanna hear them?"

Oikawa sobbed and nodded. The softest smile was playing on Iwaizumi's thick lips and oh, Oikawa adored it so much.

"First: Who thinks you're the best friend, volleyball partner and boyfriend they could ever have, despite _and_ because of all those things you said you hated about yourself?" started Iwaizumi.

_Iwa-chan._

"Second: Who's gonna beat the hell out of anyone _and you_ if they say some bullshit about you?" he continued.

_Iwa-chan._

"And the third question: Who's never gonna break up with you because they're gonna love both your looks and your personality, love _you_ with all you are for eternity?"

_Iwa-chan._

Iwaizumi didn't stutter, didn't blink, he was talking with so much certainty it blew Oikawa's mind. And Oikawa cried loudly again, closing his eyes, his tears not willing to stop. His forehead met Iwaizumi's, whose smile was warmer and brighter than the greatest star Oikawa had ever seen. He loved Iwa-chan so much and now he realized Iwa-chan felt exactly the same way about him. He still couldn't believe it, even after years of dating.

"Come here, love," Iwaizumi said quietly and hugged Oikawa's slender crouched figure tight, this time without the blanket dividing them. The other just gripped his shirt and hid his face into the crook of Iwaizumi's neck. It smelled like home, like his Hajime.

"You are neither 'too much' or 'not enough'. No matter, what you or anyone says or thinks, you are worth it, Tooru, you deserve it all. And I could never be uncomfortable around you, you are my comfort point! Shh, I'm here with you, Tooru. You will be alright, okay?" he assured him, caressing his boyfriend's head and back, calming him down. The other answered with a single nod, pulling himself closer, trying to bury hismself in his lover's embrace completely.

After half an hour Iwaizumi heard a small: "I'm sorry."

"What for?" he didn't understand.

"Everything," sounded Oikawa's reply, "but especially for ruining the date today."

"Shut up," Iwaizumi interrupted him, "I have no idea what you mean."

When Oikawa looked up at him with questionmarks in his watery eyes, he continued: "This _is_ a date! We're together, we're talking and cuddling. If it isn't a date, I don't know what it is."

Then Iwaizumi heard the best sound in the world. Oikawa laughed. Tooru's real, pure smile had always made him extremely happy. And his laugh? That was on a whole new level.

"Iwa-chan, you're so cute now," the setter giggled.

"Says you..." Iwaizumi mumbled for himself, not really planning to say it out loud.

"Me?" Oikawa's eyes were wide open and shining, but not with tears anymore. He was excited to hear something like that from his grumpy boyfriend so much!

"What? No! You look ugly when you cry, you're definitely not cute now at all!" Iwa growled and pushed Oikawa's face away. _God, he is so adorable like this!_ his brain screamed anyway.

"Mean!" Oikawa pouted but started laughing again. Iwaizumi smiled a little, too.

"I'm so tired," Oikawa admitted with a serious expression, "can we sleep like this?"

"My arms would fall off." Iwaizumi shook his head. He pushed Oikawa, who landed on the bed. "Let's eat and then we can get a proper sleep here, hm?"

"Can't we just eat in the morning? Please, I really don't feel like eating now and I'm seriously exhausted," his raspy voice didn't get much better, either.

Iwaizumi didn't like it at all, but he agreed. He could see it on Tooru's face, too. He lied next to his boyfriend and covered them both with the blanket. He looked into the big chocolate eyes and saw them filling with smile and love.

"I love you," he blurted out. He may have blushed after he'd heard himself saying it, but he meant it and didn't take it back.

Oikawa's gorgeous eyes showed his shock from the sudden and straighforward confession.

"I love you, too, Iwa-chan," he whispered back with a lump in his throat. He was on the verge of crying again. He'd thought he'd used all of his stored tears, however, hearing those words made him overly emotional, since he wasn't listening to them very often. He'd also been keeping everything in for way too long and it was all coming out at once now, that was why he felt like he'd been crying for ages while it'd only been two hours. He still felt bad for breaking down like that before a date _and_ in front of Iwaizumi, though. But maybe, he wondered, maybe it was for the better. Iwaizumi knew him almost better than he knew himself. And he always did everything to keep him healthy and happy.

Iwaizumi shifted himself closer to Oikawa and wrapped his arms around him. Oikawa smiled with satisfaction and happiness and a single stray tear fell on the pillow. Iwaizumi brushed the wet trail on Oikawa's face away with a thumb. Oikawa leaned into the touch and Iwaizumi hugged him again.

"You're beautiful, Tooru," he said, "I really hope you know it."

Iwaizumi was sure that if his brain could express emotions, it'd look hella smug at the moment he saw Oikawa's rosy cheeks. It was because of him. Only he could make that man's face burn like that. And, God, he loved it.

"You're not bad yourself, Iwa-chan," Oikawa smirked, causing the other snort.

"Being the best friend of the prettiest man on the planet was too hard for me, so I decided to date him instead. And now everyone can kiss my ass because I have the prettiest and the hardest working man of all only for myself," Iwaizumi shrugged.

"Damn, what am I gonna do with you?" Oikawa chuckled sleepily at the cringy monologue.

"Kiss me," Iwaizumi suggested simply. Oikawa wasn't startled this time, his lover was often even more demanding. Their lips touched in a lazy kiss. And another one. And another one...

"No more self-blame and self-hatred," Iwaizumi ordered before they dozed off.

"No more," Oikawa repeated and snuggled closer to Iwaizumi's chest. Iwaizumi looked at him one last time before closing his eyes, watching how much his Tooru resembled a real prince.

 _No more. He promised_ , Iwaizumi thought. Everything was going to be just right.


End file.
